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(Hotels and GuestHouses) / (Emergency) / (Getting Around) (Women Where and How) / (Tips and Warnings) (Patong) / (Phuket Town) / (Karon/Kata Area) / (Others)
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Ok, here is the official tour guide book take on Phuket "Dubbed the 'Pearl of the South', Phuket is Thailand's largest island and lies in the Andaman Sea off the country's south-western coast. The island is connected to the Thai mainland by a bridge, but has retained a distinct culture fused from Chinese and Portuguese influences combining with the culture of the chao naam, the indigenous sea-faring people. About 35% of the island's population are Thai Muslims. The island's terrain varies from rocky beaches
and long, broad sweeps of sand to limestone cliffs and forested hills.
It has good beaches, tropical vegetation and a
Ok, here is our general take on Phuket Phuket is
still tying to find its place in the tourism market of Thailand, it was
known in the past by foreigners as the place for beautiful beaches,
backpacker heaven, where they filmed
"James Bond" and the "Beach", it does have incredible
beaches and little island hideaways where you could spend weeks without
every seeing another living person. But increasingly it is With that said we still feel that we need to do a complete section on Phuket because it is still the third most visited location in Thailand, Bangkok and Pattaya being 1 and 2. The upside of coming to Phuket Sun, Sand and Sex! Clear
warm water, white sandy beaches, many little islands where you can be
alone and relax, absolutely a beautiful location. Even with the huge
influx of tourism over the last few years, Phuket Island is still a very
nice place and is still very beautiful. Familiarity,
due to the high amount of Ex-pats that call Phuket their home you will
not feel out of place in Phuket. There is not a place that you can
go in Phuket that you will not see a foreigner there as well. It
won't matter if your German, French or American, you will find a piece
of your culture somewhere in Phuket. Safe, Phuket is very safe for
the tourist, very rarely do I hear anything about a mugging or murder
here (among foreigners), most deaths that I hear about are
auto/motorbike accidents or ex-pats that have killed themselves after
their Thai girlfriend left them when their money ran out (what's the
number one rule? Have a great time, make friends, and let it all
out but take it for what it is and Don't fall in
love with these ladies (Non working Thai
ladies excluded)). You just don't have the crime that you do
in Bangkok or Pattaya against foreigners here, when I go to
The downside of coming to Phuket Cost. This is by far the most expensive area in Thailand. The girls here during the high season (Dec, Jan, Feb, being the peak) seem to be out of control, I have heard that some are asking for as much as 3,000bht or more a night, and getting it. If the lady is outstanding in appearance she wont negotiate at all, why fuck 3 times for 1000 when you know that some fool will pay you 3000 for 1 fuck, even if that takes her two days to get it she still makes out. Most of the ladies never have to wait that long during high season and some even pull in two or three a day, do the math, these ladies can make some serious cash while in there prime here in Phuket. Limited amount of ladies, Phuket has about a third of the amount of ladies that Pattaya has, and of course Bangkok who knows how many ladies are there. Too many damn ex-pats, I don't know about you but when I travel I like things to be a little different, a little adventure, but here there are so many scruffy looking dudes with blond hair and blue eyes, I thought I was in California at times. You know your in Thailand but its almost like a twilight-zone Thailand, halfway between the west and the east. The women seem a little harder here then else where even more so then Bangkok. It seems that this is where they go after they learn the trade in Bangkok and Pattaya and find out that Phuket is the Land of milk and honey for Bar Girls. And yes, every Bar Girl says "I only do this for one month, what you don't believe me", as tears begin welling in her eyes. Bottom Line If money is not an issue and you want to have both a great location, Sun, Sand and water with a Pattaya type of night life then this might be the place for you. Especially if your the outdoors type that enjoys doing outdoor actives during the day rather then sleeping off the binge from the previous night.
There are hundreds of hotels in Patong beach alone and they range from backpacker hovels to full on five star Resorts, your budget is the only factor as to what kind of place you can find. Check the map here to see the location of each area. With the amount of hotels in Phuket it would take us 5 pages to list them all and most of this would be useless information for you. There are 20 or 30 sites that already list hotels in Phuket and you can do a booking right on line with them, one of the better ones that we have found is here ( http://www.phuket-maps.com/ ). One of the most important factors for many men when choosing a hotel in Phuket is, if they have a "Joiner" fee (a "Joiner" fee is where a hotel will charge you an extra 100 to 1,000 Bht for the night if you bring a lady back to your room). All the upper end hotels in Patong will have "Joiner" fees, the lower you go in cost the less likely that they will have a "Joiner" fee, so needless to say most of the hotels listed below are the mid or low-mid end range. One of the things that baffles me is that even if a hotel has or has not a "Joiner" fee policy, it can solely be dependent on the staff that is on at the time you return to your hotel. Some staff might not bother and just let you go up or others might try and gauge you for extra, who knows? this is Phuket. This is part of the problem that we mentioned earlier about Phuket not knowing what it wants, the "Joiner" fee was started by the higher end Hotels to discourage "Sex Tourist", but then all the Hotels saw this as extra income and started doing it. Now there is a small revote from the "Sex tourist" who stay mostly at the mid priced hotels and choosing not to stay at the Hotels with the "Joiner" fees. The mid priced Hotels are starting to realize that this is not such a good idea and most are backing off "Joiner" fees, with the higher end Hotels keeping them because it is having the exact effect that they wanted. We believe that the list below will be the most useful to our members, it is a list of hotels that DO NOT ask for a "Joiner" fee. Although we know this list to be current on the day that we published it, we would still recommend calling the hotel to make sure as this rule does seem to change often. Non "Joiner" fee Hotels
(Again these rules seem to change all the time so double check before
you book. Hotels with a ** next to
the name are hotels that we have actually stayed in and can recommend.)
Emergency Contacts and Numbers Some good numbers to have, Hospital addresses below, there are only two that we recommend you using, Phuket International and Bangkok-Phuket, these two are very close to western standards. There is a Hospital in Patong, use this only as a last resort, but get yourself to one of the two above right away if you need any substantial medical care. They cost much more but this is one thing you do not want to be cheap about. Police
Hotline: 191 Tourist
Police: 1699
Phuket has a few areas that could be considered distinct tourist sections with Patong being the biggest. We will focus on the main areas of Patong, Phuket Town, Kata/Karon and a few other smaller areas. They all work pretty much the same way with the expectation of Phuket Town which is more in line with the Thai sex industry but should not be over looked as this is one of the few areas that we "Farang" can really be a part of it. (Phuket Town) / (Patong) / (Kata/Karon) / (Others)
Tried and True Hotels The Women The Bars Tai Pan (sorry no web-page) - I call this place a Beer Bar on steroids, its really not a disco or an ago-go but a Beer Bar that kind of just expanded. The thing is, its a party 100% this is where the Bar Girls go to let loose (and get more customers), lots of free lancers. Extasy Ago-go - Laid back, great staff and the owners a nice guy as well. I like going here because the inside is big and roomy and the ladies, well he don't have a hell of a lot and they are not the best looking but most are very sweet and will take good care of you. This is the place I go to have people say "Hey Norm" its just that kind of friendly place.
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pleasant, relaxed
atmosphere. The main resorts include Patong, Karon and Kata, but better
beaches are scattered all around the island. Roads radiate from Phuket
Town, in the south-east of the island, making it a good base for
exploring. Don't ignore the island's interior which has rice paddies,
plantations of rubber and cashew nut, cacao, pineapple and coconut, as
well as Phuket's last slice of rainforest."
becoming know as the second Pattaya both by foreigners and Thais
alike. The local economy has seen a large increase in "Sex
Tourism" but also a large decrease in "Normal
Tourism". The Phuket Government is attempting to bring back
"Normal Tourism" (as is all of Thailand) by really cracking
down on the Sex industry. They have made some major closures of
well know establishments and deported some well know
ex-pats. All this lends its self to the looking over your
shoulder to see what's next type of effect. This added to the fact
that Phuket is the most expensive location in Thailand, we could not
recommend this place, you can find better sex holidays elsewhere, you
can find better "get away" holidays elsewhere and no matter
where else you go it will be cheaper. If you want sex, go to Pattaya,
the women are cheaper with a much larger selection, if you want a beach
get away, get a lady out of Pattaya then take her with you to Trang.
That would be our recommendations till Phuket decides what it wants to
be when it grows up.
Pattaya I am
always careful and never get too drunk or out of control, but in Phuket
I never have felt uncomfortable and believe me I have had some major
drunk fest here and always no problem. They have great places to
see and stay within the Phuket area once you have hooked up with just
one lady (or two for that matter). If you stay for awhile you
always end up hooking up with one lady, the nice part is that here in
Phuket there are islands and places that are quieter and not so
crazy, you can take them to be alone and really get your groove on.
The other good part about Phuket is that you can pretty easily get into
the Thai side of the Sex industry, there are places in Phuket town, that
we tell you about later, where you can get short times for 200 to 400
bht (5 to 10 dollars). These places normally cater to the Thais
but foreigners are welcomed as well.
This is just a basic guide for the
fare and all fares need to be bargained and agreed
upon before getting into the Tuk Tuk. The Tuk Tuk workers
Union is very strong here in Phuket, the Government recently tried to
implement a fixed fare schedule for Tuk Tuks but the Union quickly shut
that down.
Bring small
gifts from your home, I'm talking dime store stuff here but if you give
it out to the staff of your favorite bar your service and chances of
being ripped off while drunk will increase and decrease accordingly big time.
This is Disney Land, all a
fantasy, what happens to 90% of the guys that come over here and can't
do this, have a certified condition its called the Prince Charming syndrome
and it basically goes like this, no she was not a virgin that was taken
out of her peaceful rice field by bad evil men and forced to do what she
is doing, and no, you are not Prince Charming on your white horse, here
to save her and to whisk her away to never never land and live happily
ever after in your house with the white picket fence, where she will be
indebted and grateful to you for the rest of your lives, shit just won't
happen. Any way we could write a book on this, just keep it in
perspective and when you go home, go home, it was a nice holiday but
that's it, and in a few months you can come back and do it all over
again!